Shouting Grounds

From Yahoo (of course): “MTV is embracing change. In nearly three decades on the air, almost everything about the cable network — from its programming, to its focus, to its place in popular culture — has changed with the times, except for its famous tagline, “Music television.” Recently, the network quietly unveiled a new logo which has dropped the tagline entirely, indicating that MTV itself is leaving its original mission of an all-music channel in the dust.”

“The new logo is meant to put the focus on MTV’s current slate of talent.”

From Socrates Points (of course): OK, the graphic has GOT to be a joke.  There’s bad photoshop (on celebs, wafer-thinners and other trash), but then there’s REALLY bad photoshop…and this logo is definitely REALLY bad photoshop.  So you’re telling me that after 30 years, MTV just crops the fuckin’ original logo?  That’s it?  Just fuckin’ crop it?  Oh wait, if I really wanted to be technical…make that “crop it and invert it.”  Done.

That’s not edgey.  That’s not new and original. That’s just fuckin’ REALLY bad photoCHOP!  A baby can do that crap.

And because of that, I’m pissed off!  You know some fuckin’ lazy gen-x asshole out there (working for MTV) came out on top with this one.

Socrates Points is back, and he’s pissed off.  Thanks.

I LOL’d

Sony Releases New Stupid Piece Of Shit That Doesn’t Fucking Work

Magic John Stone back with your stupid ass for another Oscar LiveBlog. Even though no one will be F5′n this mother fucker during the show, I’ll be posting up like the Mailman every few minutes to let you know how lame the Academy is this year.

7p central, Oscar Fashion Handjob Pregame (blueballs mix)
- Just like last year, forgot that hollywood thinks we tune into the Oscars to find out who these overpaid screws gave too much money to for their dresses and suits…what a joke. Maybe seek out the stars to ask them interesting questions instead of cupping their genitals like total fuckups.
- Diane Lane…num num.
- Amy Adams is pretty hot, short but hot…like a little hot pocket. Tuna Croissant Pocket.
- Sarah Jessica Parker is still a Gremlin, Matthew Broderick is still a retard.
- Now this cheese dick is interviewing Valentino? WHO FUCKING CARES?! Movies, assface!
- Good to see Danny Boyle brought half of India to the show…wonder why no one cares what they’re wearing?
- Mickey Rourke is the ugliest Pimp in Hollywood. It’s gotta be hard out there for a Pimp.
- Vanessa Hudgens looks different with clothes on.
- Robert Downey Jr is cool.
- Viola Davis, from Doubt, is up for Best Supporting Actress…I think she was in the movie for like 4 1/2 minutes. And yeah, I saw that shit.
- How old is Miley Cyrus again?
- Anne Hathaway…num num.
- The douches with the winning envelopes have plastic smiles.
- Meryl Streep’s daughter is bangin’! But there’s always the fear she’ll age like mom.
- 16. Miley Cyrus is 16…
- Jack Black knows how it is…he’s dug in at the bar. And he made the interviewer look like the tool he is.
- Marisa Tomei…num num. Yes please.
- Seth Rogan and Judd Apatow are dug in with Jack Black at the boozer. Smart peoples.
- Segment about the thinking behind the production of the Oscars…slightly interesting.

End of Pregame, I’m unsatisfied.

- Huge Assman is hosting…this should be interesting. Wonder if he’s the first guy from the Criminal Continent to host?
- Kate Winslet is a serious MILF
- Huge Assman is playing it like SNL…pretty smart.
- Shit…he can really dance too. That makes me nervous.
- Nice, he wonders too why The Dark Knight’s not up for best Movie.
- LOL…overall one of the better intro Montage/Performances I can remember. I think it’s partly because Huge actually thought it was funny too.

- Angelina Jolie, good god. They should clone her or something.
- Ew…Tilda Swinton creeps me out.
- Guinan! Red light y’all! I’m sure Whoopi will find some reason to slow down and complicate the Oscars.
- I think Huge should give Anjelica Huston the old Croc Dundee Dick-Check…she’s looking like she picked up a Y-chromo or two somewhere.
- Goldie Hawn’s 1 drink away from dreamland, and 1/2 inch away from showing her complete pec’s to the Academy.

**AWARD**
Best Supporting Actress – Penelope Cruz for Vicky Cristina Barcelona

- Penelope Cruz? Really? I think that was Marisa Tomei’s award…or the woman from Ben Button. Once again the Academy shows its tendency to give awards away to foreign movies. Just a little conspiracy theory of mine.
- Great…Steve Martin. Maybe as soon as his mouth opens someone will shoot him.
- Shit…that didn’t happen.
- Tina Fey is hot, but I gotta say there’s something not right about her hair.
- I haven’t heard of any of these fucking movies for Best Original Screenplay.
- Oh wait, In Bruge! Shit yeah! Now Milk, here we go…what were those first two movies?
- Now WALL-E? Really?

**AWARD**
Best Original Screenplay – Dustin Lance Black for Milk

- Milk was a good movie, I can accept this award.
- Fuck, this guy is young.
- Have a feeling Slumdog’s gonna win Best Adapted Screenplay.

**AWARD**
Best Adapted Screenplay – Simon Beaufoy for Slumdog Millionaire

- Good award, fantastic movie. I think this guy’s wearing a Pleather Tux. Probably pretty warm.
- I think Jennifer Aniston’s about to lose her shit being this close to Angelina Jolie.
- The Animation 2008 montage wasn’t too inspiring…

**AWARD**
Best Animated Feature Film – WALL-E

- WHOOP-E
- Philip Seymor Hoffman’s wearing a seaman’s watchcap and holding a bible or something.

**AWARD**
Best Animated Short Film – La Maison en Petits Cubes

- PURE EXCITEMENT.

- Sarah Jessica Parker’s got some grapefruit tits.
- Daniel Craig is a man’s man. He should do us all a favor and choke the Gremlin to death.

**AWARD**
Art Direction – The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

- Yeah yeah yeah. So it was good…but you know I wanted TDK to win.

**AWARD**
Costume Design – The Duchess

- A Dude just won an Oscar for designing ridiculous women’s dresses. An Irishman to boot… What’s the world coming to?
- So far, this show is like Mountain Dew that you can watch. Xtreme!
- That was a joke…

**AWARD**
Makeup Artist – The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

- TDK’s now 0 for 2 on the night. Just so you know.
- You know how they have that pre-award show for technical acheivements? How about boxing all of these stupid ass costume/makeup/set awards into that and shorten this goddamn show?
- How the fuck does the sleepy cuntrag vampire-pussy from Twilight end up on the Oscars? And presenting the “Romance 2008″ montage. Pheph!

- Natalie Portman…nummie num num.
- Cinematography, Slumdog or Button?

**AWARD**
Cinematography – Anthony Dod Mandle for Slumdog Millionaire

- 0 for 3.
- Slumdog’s gonna sweep up.
- Guess I’ve never seen Danny Boyle, he looks like a functioning retard.
- Ohmigod, Jessica Biel. NUM.
- Awesome, a Pineapple Express short film! w00t!

**AWARD**
Best Live Action Short – Spiiegle’sland or something

- This guy’s a nat-zi.
- I want to bone Meryl Streep’s daughter.
- Wanna take a moment to throw a shout-out to my boy Redscape watching the Oscars from the West Suburbs…
- Assman’s doing the big Broadway again. Damn…Beyonce…Damn…
- Huge Assway. Broad Assman. Think about it.
- The ‘Musicals’ performance, pretty good. Some classic showbiz right there.
- Here’s Best Supporting Actor…Heath Ledger HAS TO FUCKING WIN THIS.
- This has to be the closest Cuba Gooding’s been to the Academy since Rod Tidwell. What a shame.
- Ironic he’s complaining about RDJ in Tropic Thunder, stealing the black man’s role. Cuba’s been too busy making diarrhea to get a good role.

**AWARD**
Best Supporting Actor – Heath Ledger for The Dark Knight…FUCK YEAH

- He deserves it…
- I wish he was around to receive it. I’d really like to have seen him get the recognition.
- Follow that up with a Documentary montage? Really? y4wn.

**AWARD**
Best Documentary – Man on Wire

- zzzzz…maybe it’s a spoof of Man on Fire? Maybe it’s about a guy that is hopelessly obsessed with the Wire? Maybe not.

**AWARD**
Best Documentary Short Subj…ah fuck it.

- PFFT!
- Action 2008 montage. Now we’re talkin’…jack it up! Xtreme.

**AWARD**
Outstanding Visual Effects – The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

- I suppose that makes sense, Iron Man and TDK, while fantastic in the VFX dept, were slightly more pedestrian than all the Ben Button shit.

**AWARD**
Outstanding Sound Editing – The Dark Knight

- Well, at least they got two.
- SNORE, how’s that for sound editing?

**AWARD**
Sound Mixing – Slumdog Millionaire

- How can two different movies with Sound Editing and Sound Mixing? Let’s face it, assholes, it’s the same fucking thing. (no matter what JT says)

**AWARD**
Film Editing – Slumdog Millionaire

- Will Smith’s apparently paying his dues for wasting his load on shitty blockbusters by presenting the mid-show F/X awards.
- Redscape thinks this Slumdog Film editor is fucking Moby. I don’t wanna know how he’d know that.

**AWARD**
Gene Hershaw Humanitarian Award – Jerry Lewis (presented by Eddie Murphy)

- Who is Eddie Murphy? He looks familiar but I can’t place him…

**AWARD**
Best Original Score – A.R. Rahman for Slumdog Millionaire

- Do they get a discount on statue plaques if they’re all the same, say Slumdog?
- The Best Original Song performance was good.

**AWARD**
Best Original Song – A.R. Rahman for Slumdog Millionaire, “Jai Ho”

- Really? Hopefully Slumdog sweeping the Oscars will just inspire people in general, not open the door for shitty Bollywood movies to head West.
- It’s 10p central, this show should be wrapping up right now…but you know we have another hour left, right? Ridiculous.

**AWARD**
Best Foreign Language Film – Don’t Bother from Magic John Stone

- I think that Liam just read the nominees for a different award…none of what he said matched the screen, nor did the winner…that’s just bad as balls.
- Oh god. Queen Latifah. Queen of what I ask you? Queen of horrible comedies? We need to find the Queen’s Castle and sack the shit out of it. Then guillotine her shit.

In Memoriam montage…notables:
- Bernie Mac
- Michael Crichton
- Roy Scheider
- Isaac Hayes
- Ricardo Montalban
- Stan Winston
- James Whitmore (Brooks)
- Charlton Heston
- Sydney Pollack
- Paul “Fucking” Newman (bytheway)

- Heath Ledger died on January 22nd last year, guess he was in last year’s montage…I was waiting to see him up there.
- I want to punish Reese Witherspoon. Wrecking Crew style.

**AWARD**
Best Director – Danny Boyle for Slumdog Millionaire

- Surprised? Me neither. He deserves it…good director.
- His head is enormous.
- Nicole Kidman looks like she just blew the band, Sophia Loren looks like a nightmare

**AWARD**
Best Actress – Kate Winslet for The Reader

- She did a great job in that movie, justifiable
- Kate Winslet should have to accept the trophy naked, and her dad looks like Hannibal Lecter back there…
- And she’s genuinely happy, no notes or political murmurs or other bullshit.
- I haven’t seen Jack all night…where’s he at?
- They got quite a crew of dudes up there…for some reason I’d like Ben Kingsley to punch Adrian Brody in the schnozi-ola-ola
- I think Sean Penn’s the man for best Actor, but I’d like to see Mickey Rourke or Brad Pitt win too

**AWARD**
Best Actor – Sean Penn for Milk

- Well, there you go. Good chips.
- Penn’s surprisingly humble, that’s cool. He’s had some great roles.
- STEVE! Where you been Steve?
- The Best Picture montage is bad ass.
- It’s gonna be Slumdog Millionaire…

**AWARD**
Best Picture – Slumdog Millionaire

- It was certainly in the cards. Milk and Button could easily have won in different years…
- I didn’t get to see Nixon, but Slumdog was the Best Picture of the lot that I saw.

done…I’m going to bed.

This is completely fucking insane. Seriously, what the fuck are these assfucks doing over at Microsoft?

Everyone knew that Sarah Palin was a fucking moron and had no business anywhere near the goddamn White House, but they kept it all a under their hats the best they could instead of thinking of “America First” like they continually claimed the Democrats weren’t doing.

Why isn’t everyone sharpening their pitch forks and grilling these criminals over their attempts to put the United States at a strategic disadvantage? One could go as far to say that it could be constituted as wreckless endangerment. It’s truly obscene the lengths at which the Republican party will go in order to hold onto the reigns of power.

The bitch didn’t know that Africa is a continent not a country!! And Fox News knew about this all a fucking LONG!!!

So…Was I expecting more? I guess I was. After all, two awesome fucking games worth of story built the legend of Max Payne…how hard should it be to take just some of that and slap it on the big screen? Apparently too hard. While there were a few small alterations that I thought were forgivable, this movie was a giant turd sandwich. The worst part to me was it didn’t even bother to accurately follow the story from the first Payne, which could have EASILY been a great movie given the right director/writer combo to put it up. Instead, as usual, some shitstain has to “make the story his own” by changing things around. Either that or they didn’t think that the American movie audience would be able to follow the original plots.

Something else that made me upset, you had the fucking cast to do it! Max, Mona, BB, Lupino, Bravura…the bitch head of Aesir! The movie looked right too! The only thing missing was story story story. Fuck it…it’s not worth anymore of my time.

Watch CBS Videos Online

I fucking DARE you to watch the clip above and NOT LAUGH at this colossal fuck-brained ape of an idiot! If we elect this fucking moron anywhere NEAR the goddamn white house, we ARE ALL FUCKED!!! I can’t believe this clip, I just can’t believe that this fucking IDIOT is on the national stage, with all the ways we’ve been fucked by the current administration, the wars, and the wall street meltdown… Bravo McCain! Bra-fucking-vo, you fucking asshole. The moment you stop trying to trick-fuck the American people is the moment you get your goddamn integrity back. Jesus CHRIST!

That's a nice polished turd you have there.

All that work to dress up his 360 and notice the horrible grinding noise the disc drive makes right before the end of the video. I sent in one of my 360’s due to that grinding, and the other destroys any disc you put in.
Summary: Microsoft Xbox 360 sucks heavy dick.

The Angry Video Game Nerd from Screwattack reviews a series of video games from the Batman franchise.

Fucking awesome!

If anyone has thought about calling Microsoft for help, you might as well staple your dick (or cunt) to your forehead, then do a back bend. I was just told by a supervisor at Microsoft XBox support that I had two options when dealing with my latest xbox 360 problem, I could either pay them over $100 to fix it or hang-up the phone.

According to her, there are no other authority figures that you can speak to once you’ve spoken to her. She only has a first name (Crystal) but no last name and no employee number. They all have email addresses, but they will not give them out. Every time you call about an issue you are treated like you had never called before. If their representatives don’t keep accurate records on your account then that’s your problem, not theirs. If you have one problem they will replace your system for up to three years, another (possibly more serious) problem and you have to pay for the repairs. You basically have two options. You can either pay or hang-up. They will refuse to help you nor care about the time and money they’ve taken from you because they are unable to take responsibility for their actions. There’s no accountability because the person you deal with is interchangeable and no empathy because all responses are scripted. Microsoft is truly the worst company I have ever personally dealt with and I will NEVER pay them another dime and I vow to dedicate all remaining effort to discourage ANYONE else from purchasing their products or services.

I just bought an N64 from a garage sale for $5. It came with Golden Eye and two controllers. It was very poorly kept and seemed to have grass and dirt inside the console. The cartridge slot was not in good shape either. Guess what….the fucking system works perfectly. My Dreamcast, which I bought back in 1999, works perfectly. My Saturn, which I bought second hand around the same time, works perfectly. My Nintendo from 1986, WORKS FUCKING PERFECTLY!!!

I’ve had 4 Xbox 360’s since 2006, and guess what….they are ALL FUCKED!!!!! Now the latest problem is that the system is chewing up my game discs!! hahahaha, fucking awesome. Not only does the system lock up in the middle while playing but it’s chewing up my $60 games, making them useless coasters, isn’t that fucking sweet!!! Thanks Microsoft!! That’s great to know that this problem-that’s costing me more money as time rolls by-is NOT covered by my warranty. Thanks Crystal, for being a useless, stonewalling CUNT! My hats off to you! There are so many more important problems in the world but I can’t avoid being insanely pissed off by such a large company SHITTING on people who shell out good money to support their products.

It is with this I leave you with my final solution. I will be filming the destruction of my Xbox 360 Pro system. I will crush the fucking thing on film then proceed to piss all over it. If you’re all lucky I will also take a huge muddy shit on it’s fractured husk. Fuck! That’s what I should have done the moment I bought it, because that would have saved me thousands of dollars in games, accessories, and online purchases. Would have been the smartest thing I could have done after having bought the thing at Circuit City.

I leave you with a trip down “Fucked by Microsoft Lane” buffeted by photo highlights of the life and death of my xbox 360’s. Fuck em all!

UPDATE

If you visit the website referenced in the support document image above you get this fucking bullshit…

UPDATE 2

Everything left that works is going out the door.

eBay Auction

I came across this video that has made it to the top of the digg page that claims in 1992 Mickey Kantor, a political aide to the Clinton campaign and now an aide to the Hilary Clinton Presidential campaign, said derogatory and racially hateful comments about residents of Indiana.

Of course some asshole puts this video on youtube, disables comments, and everyone takes the bait. No one in the digg comments even suggests that the video is erroneous and doctored. The text subtitles that are displayed show an entirely different message than most likely was said. The subtitles are as follows:

“It doesn’t matter if we win. Those people are shit. How would you like to be a worthless white ni**er”

If you listen closely to the tape and pay attention to Mikey’s mouth at the end of the video you’ll see that he doesn’t say anything of the sort. What he actually said (if you pay attention) was:

“It doesn’t matter if we win. Those people are shitting. How would you like to be unintelligible“

What happens is, they change the subtitles to read like he’s calling Hoosiers “shit” and since the last part of the “How would you like to be” sentence is whispered, the fellow creating the video added in his own lines (spoken from the heart, i’m sure) over the original audio to make it seem like this guy said it.

Don’t you find it odd that this video emerges just before the Indiana primary. Also, if this was anywhere near accurate, you don’t think that someone would have shit a brick in the last 10+ years since the documentary was released? Underhanded bullshit

Here is the video for your review, in all it’s bullshit glory….

Update

Here is the captured video since they took the real one off of youtube. I’m sure it’ll be back, under a different account without comments enabled, trying to spread bullshit throughout the net

Update 2

Audio Analysis – Clinton War Clip

After locating a similar clip of the video and comparing it to the version that was pulled from youtube, it doesn’t seem to have been doctored at all. The pulled clip was a bit noisier but that could be a product of the video capture. I’ve sampled both clips and assuming the second “original” clip is legit they seem to be the same recording.

I took the audio output of the pulled clip and put this on the left channel and then took the other “original” clip and pasted it on the right channel. What you are hearing is two clips side-by-side. If there were any differences or signs of doctoring then you would hear the clips either go out of sync or you would hear temporary panning as the two clips differed.

As of this moment I don’t know what the last comment was. I still believe that he didn’t say the people of Indiana were “shit”. He definitely said “they are shitting”, which I would believe to be a reference to the white house since Clinton was ahead in Indiana, a normally red state. The last statement seems to be a combination of his words and James Carville’s muttering, since he was reading information from a document right next to the camera. I really don’t know. What do you guys think?

 

 Mickey Kantor - Shitting Comment [00:00:36m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (393)
 Combined War Clips: Download (64)

Fresh off the press from our favorite fear-machine! CNN has a new ‘feature’ called “CNN T-Shirt“. If you czech out the headlines under “Latest News”, you’ll see some of the stories have the little camera icon next to them, sure to deliver about 90 seconds of commercials and 30 seconds of news. Nothing new right? Well today I see a little t-shirt icon next to that one. Clicked on it and get this Total Bullshit (TM) new idea…CNN T-Shirt. Apparently you can order a shirt in your choice of size, color and sex…with the headline and the timestamp of when it happened.

Okay…are you really fucking kidding me? Try this one on, dumbshits:

Seriously, fuck that town.